Books for Bridges: How Stories can Shape Families

When my first grader was a toddler and able to manage the flip sections on a board book, I got a copy of Where is Spot? I thought she would love each surprise. Instead, she took the book out of my hands and flipped to the end with her brow furrowed. The expression only loosened when she lifted the basket and found where Spot had been hiding all along. It was one of the earliest glimmers of my daughter’s personality and her need for certainty. Was Spot there? Would Sally find him? She had to know before we even began the story! To this day, she will flip to the back of a book to find the resolution. As she grows older, this task becomes complicated by the many chapters between start and finish.

My daughter’s anxiety about the unknown is nebulous. It isn’t enough to claim spaces as safe and it’s wrong to dismiss her worries as too small to be brought forward. So what’s a Mom to do? I return to storytelling. I remind her that God is the great author of our story and we are called to be the heroes. Heroes often find themselves lost in the thick of their journey and the end is rarely clear but the hope of homecoming persists.

The potential of a story changes when you see yourself as a part of one. For me, reading becomes a way to connect with my children. Very rarely do they ever bring home anything concrete to report about their day. My attempts to pry into their school lives are met with annoyance. Recently, a copy of Raina Telgemeier’s Smile was dropped on my lap. It isn’t age appropriate for a six-year old, but I’m glad that we journeyed together through the wilds of the 90’s Bay Area. Like Raina, the main character, I was that tween who played with toys while her peers drifted into makeup and magazines. I also experienced the same inner-friendship teasing that led to a Hero’s journey through uncertainty and shame into self-confidence. I came away from Smile aware that by discussing the events of the book, I am showing that I understand how complicated growing up is and that I am here to share in the burden. I can normalize the fact that people have to learn how to have positive friendships and that it is an intentional thing sometimes to choose kindness over selfish instincts.

When we read as a family and discuss the stories, we have the ability to create these conversations between our values and priorities and the ones that our children are developing. If we take the time to imagine now then we are ready for when real challenges arise. Our children– the Heroes that they are– have the opportunity to understand that they are not isolated in their circumstances. We care but more than us, they are in good company with a Creator who is infinitely invested in their story.